Just Under TWO Weeks Now.

Today there is a barbecue at the school, and all the neighborhood is invited to come in and check out what we're doing. You would think that I would be too busy helping to organize, but I've found that I can't stand to be helping the volunteers that come down. They create organized chaos, and get underfoot when I try to do the farm work. Therefore, today is a chill day for me. I'm taking this opportunity to write out all the things that I've been feeling, but don't have the time to write about:

So, I've been here for a while, just over three weeks with just under two weeks to go. It's not at the end of the trip, but it's kind of incredible how fast the learning curve is down here. I was recently working alongside one of the volunteers that came down here and I had an interesting exchange with them. We were seeding, which has since become my absolute favorite aspect of farm work, and they asked how long I had been down here. I told her that I'd been down here for just a couple of weeks, and she said, "Wow, I for sure would have thought that you've been here for at LEAST a month or two."

I was a little bit shocked at first, but then I thought about my position from her vantage point. I was essentially running the sprout workshop; I directed people as to what they should do, why they should do it, and what the outcome of their work would be. It would seem to her, who had almost no knowledge of the farm, that I had a complete understanding of what was going on down here-which is FAR from true. But I have come a long way from the shipwrecked girl that arrived as. It reflects the general approach to life down here, move fast, learn and adapt quickly, or you will be left so far behind.

I've noticed down here that people have knowledge and the ability to do things that is far beyond my scope of understanding. For example: The other day I was told to pry the signs off of one of the hoop houses (where sprouts are placed until they are ready to be harvested). I spent at least an HOUR trying to pry the damn thing off and was met with limited success. Another person came over, and pried all the signs off in under fifteen minutes. People down here can make something from nothing; they can take a broken house and build it back up with almost no money. It's an ability that is almost terrifyingly powerful. I can only imagine the potential that people like that have, and what they could accomplish given a first-rate education and an opportunity to let them shine.

Perhaps I should explain what I mean when I say opportunity; life in this part of the country is tough. In fact, it is more than tough. I've decided that the South is a scary place, and I do not feel safe. I walked into this neighborhood with a false sense of security, thinking that things down here can't be 'that bad'. That isn't true. This neighborhood, which was once a regular, middle-class neighborhood, is filled with violence. When I was down in Houma, there was a shooting near the school and someone was killed. Now, there are t-shirts in the neighborhood that are posted around the school with a very disturbing image and message, referencing the person that was killed. In the most twisted way possible, there is something comforting about this situation: I am NOT a part of this neighborhood, and nothing that goes on down here involves me. No one has a problem with me, I'm not involved in any groups, gangs, or families in the area. This is not Rwanda, the violence is not random or based on ethnicity. That's good for me, but what about the children that live in the area who have to grow up in this type of environment...

The NY2NO students that are here are also from Philly, and yesterday I had a really scary conversation with some of the students. They were talking about their neighborhoods in North and South Philly and all the, pardon my language, shit that they have seen and have been through. They were talking about shootings that they had actually heard about, or been present for. One of the students was talking about how someone had been killed standing right next to them, right in the middle of conversation. I learned, from these people, the do's and don'ts of being involved in a shooting. Apparently, you never run away; always walk away calmly so that the shooter doesn't think that you're running to go squeal. Also, if anyone ever comes around asking about what happened, you didn't see ANYTHING. I don't think I'll ever need to use this knowledge, and it surprised me that it was like common sense...

Yesterday I went foraging for native wetlands plants. Do you know where I went foraging? In the neighborhood. As Brennan so eloquently put it, "I'm just going to cruise the streets that I know are the most fucked up." There were streets where wetland plants literally crept up over three feet into the streets. There was a sinkhole that was over two and a half feet deep. I wish that I had brought my camera to take pictures, because it was absolutely unbelievable. Houses were tipped over or completely gutted, and plants dominated the area. One thought that just keeps recurring in my mind is, "This was a normal neighborhood before the hurricane. It's now five years later, and things are still this bad."

Random Thoughts
(I might expand on these later)

-I have never been this race conscious in my entire life.
-I will do more research on the terms "African-American" and "Black-American".
-Teenagers need to be humbled.
-Why is it that some people try to help others, and others shirk from their duties?
-The distinction between luxury and comfort, and excessive consumption.
-The Cuban Caravan and the Cuban Five (I know that sounds random, but the school hosted the caravan and I got to attend one of their diners)
-People with money and attention to detail need to start working for or helping out with non profits.
-The impact that a socially active lifestyle has on my mental and emotional health, and what would happen if I didn't get to leave at the end of 5 weeks.
-I want a cat.

Also, I just wanted to thank the people that have been reading this blog and been dropping me kind notes. It's very encouraging, and makes me feel like I'm not wasting my time down here.